This week, we were instructed
to observe an episode of a television show that we don’t normally watch (with
the sound turned off) so we could observe what the characters were feeling and
expressing based on their nonverbal behavior. I choose to watch an episode of “How I met Your Mother”. Lilly, one of
the main characters was in labor and about to give birth. Her husband, Marshall
happened to be in Atlantic City with his friend Barney and had a difficult time
getting back to New York for the birth. Lilly’s friends Robin and Ted coached
her through the beginning stages of labor and eventually took her to the
hospital
Although I had never watched an
episode of this show, it was obvious to me that it was a comedy and the actors
were exaggerating their roles. I’m sure my personal schema regarding childbirth
led to my empathy for Lilly who was obviously in discomfort during contractions.
She was holding her belly and her face looked like she was in agony. It was clear
that Robin and Ted were extremely nervous and tried to comfort Lilly by
massaging and talking to her through contractions.
Once at the hospital, it was
obvious that the doctor was telling Ellie to push, but Ellie was scared. I
noticed myself hoping that her husband would arrive before the birth. When Marshall finally showed up in the delivery room, Ellie seemed relieved and soon their
baby boy was born.
When I watched the show again
with sound, I found that the only thing I missed the first time was that Robin
believed she had experience with childbirth because of her practice with horses
giving birth on the farm she grew up on. Ellie continually reminded Robin that
she was not a farm animal and was not comforted at all by her friends
“experience”. Schemas can help us to
send and receive messages that are effective and accurate, however sometimes
schemas can make us less perceptive communicators (O’Hair and Wiemann, 2012).
References
O’Hair, D. & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real communication: an introduction. New York: Bedford/S.Martin’s
HI Christine,
ReplyDeleteI have seen this show a few times and it is very much a comedy. Through your writing, I can picture Lilly holding her stomach and her face pinched up with agony of the pain coursing through her body. The nonverbal skills being used to express her feelings speak louder than any words being expressed to describe the pain she is in. Her gestures, facial features, and body language are a form of nonverbal communication skills that everyone is comfortable with using to express one's thoughts or feelings about any given situation. Lilly's friend was trying to help based on her experiences through an animal and a person in labor are very different and her verbal communication at support her friend through her labor was not as effective as she hoped. I think in this situation each person would have benefited from the use of being an active listener. The friend would have been aware of her friends pain and struggles through her nonverbal communication skills and use her experiences to listen to her friends feelings and description of the pain she was going through. Being an active listener requires the use of actively listening to a person's verbal and nonverbal communication skills at any moment.
References:
O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Verbal communication. In Real communication: An introduction (2nd ed.). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.
O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Nonverbal communication. In Real communication: An introduction (2nd ed.). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.
O’Hair, D., & Wiemann, M. (2012). Listening. In Real communication: An introduction (2nd ed.). New York: Bedford/St. Martin's.