I understand that my social
identities of being a white, Christian, heterosexual woman have afforded me
internalized privilege including economic, social and cultural advantages in my
life (Deman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010). These advantages have included a
succession of rights, expectations, and experiences that have made daily life
easier for me. However, growing up with dyslexia in the nineteen sixties also
allowed me to experience the internalized oppression and psychological
consequences of belonging to a social identity group that faces institutional
prejudice and discrimination.
Elementary school was extremely
difficult for me and I can still remember the pain and feeling of inadequacy
while sitting in remedial reading groups year after year. I wanted to read so
badly, but I couldn’t decipher the print. I learned to make fun of myself (and
others) in order to make my classmates laugh. By becoming the class clown, I
received attention that I perceived as positive. My teachers believed that I
simply wasn’t trying… I have learned that the comments and insults I received
as a child were microaggressions. These brief everyday indignities were
communicated both intentionally and unintentionally and contained insulting
messages (Laureate Education, 2011). Unfortunately, this cumulative verbal
abuse caused me to believe that I was “stupid” and left deep seated scars.
Thank goodness I was an excellent athlete and experienced success on the track.
I can literally remember running my frustration into the ground.
At age eighteen, I was finally
diagnosed with dyslexia, a challenge that few had ever heard of. I attended
private evening reading lessons and was taught to read in a revolutionary way
so that I could understand the print. I remember the feeling of joy and relief
at finally being able to READ!
While my experience was
difficult, I believe in the long run it made me a better teacher. I taught
first grade for several years and had an incredible amount of patience for
children who struggled academically. I loved filling them with self-confidence
and the certainty that eventually an understanding of the curriculum would
come. As Deman-Sparks reminds us, the emotional as well as cognitive journey of
sorting out our internalized privilege and oppression frees us to be better
teachers (Deman-Sparks & Olsen Edwards, 2010).
References
Derman-Sparks, L., & Olsen Edwards, J. (2010) Anti-bias
education for young children
and ourselves, Washington, DC:
NAEYC.
Video: Laureate
Education (2011). Microaggressions in everyday life, Retrieved
from:
Christine,
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your experience with microaggressions. There are many children out there that struggle with the same challenge you had. It is crucial for children to be diagnosed at an early because it can assist educators and parents in providing the right resources for children. In what other ways did this experience helped you become a better teacher?
Christine,
ReplyDeleteThis is an excellent example of a microaggression and oppression. I try to keep in mind that everyday I work with students who may have undiagnosed learning or health deficits that influence thier behavior and self image. You had the added challenge of having a disability that was newly discovered and therefore few had heard of it, meaning the likelihood you it being diagnosed earlier in your life was small. I am so happy that you received the diagnosed and was able to work with teachers who found a system of teaching that worked for you. I am also happy that you are now in the field and a testament to the importance of instilling confidence in children.